Patience and Reconciliation

Daniella got married when she was 22. She and her husband met in college, and they entered med school together. Fast forward ten years, and the combination of busyness, emotional distance, and alcohol dependence set the stage for Daniella to have an affair with the husband of her best friend. The secret eventually surfaced, and she and her husband separated. After couples counseling and a lot of thinking, she and her husband reunited. The Daniella who came into my office was calm, sober, happily married, and ready to keep thinking about herself so that her anxiety and immaturity didn’t run the show in her relationships.


Essay in New York Magazine

19-therapy-culture-therapizing-friends.w710.h473Not long ago, a close friend of mine was struggling with a huge life decision: Should she marry her long-term partner, or was it time to part ways? “Be my therapist!” she begged me at one point, when the two of us were hanging out with a group of friends. I tried to deflect, but she kept requesting my advice, like it was a party trick. Over the course of the night, I watched as our other friends offered their own opinions on her partner, only sharing my thoughts when we finally got a moment alone.

Read the rest of my essay from New York magazine here.



4 Essential Strategies for Coping With Stress

My latest from Thought Catalog

shutterstock_94267417Did you know that when a work project is past due, or a massive truck veers in front of you on the highway, your body flips on the same physiological responses as if a lion was chasing you? Our physiology kept us alive as a species when we had to escape predators on the savannah, but now this chronic triggering takes its toll on the human body.

While thirty lions might not chase you every day, you might have thirty worries that send the stress-response system into overdrive. The fact that we can anticipate catastrophe before it even occurs is one of the best and worst things about being human. Thinking ahead keeps us alive, but it also keeps us up at night, with worries tipping over like dominoes in our anxious heads. Read the rest here.